Four Questions

The Four Questions Are 90% Mental. The Other Half Is Physical.

What is Dave wearing today? Dave is wearing a purple Tampa Bay Devil Rays1 T-shirt, a Havana Industriales baseball cap, shorts, and Stan Smiths.

How does Dave feel today? Dave is sad.

What are the factors affecting Dave’s mood today? Dave just learned that Hank Aaron has died. As a baseball player, he broke records. As a person, he broke barriers.

How will Dave commemorate the life of Hank Aaron this afternoon? Dave plans to watch the episode of Futurama in which Leela becomes a pitcher for the New New York Mets and solicits help from Hank Aaron XXIV, Aaron’s descendent and the worst blurnsball2 player of all time. Here’s my favorite exchange from the episode:

1 Yes, it’s a real Devil Rays T-shirt. It predates the name change.
2 Baseball in the future. As Leela says: “Face it, Fry. Baseball was as boring as mom and apple pie. That’s why they jazzed it up.”