Whatnot
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Hello. Do You Want in on the Joke?
Yesterday’s installment of The Four Questions contained not one but two inside jokes about Tig Notaro’s show on Sunday night. If you watch this old clip from The Tonight Show, you’ll see what I was referring to: Want more Tig? She also incorporated this story into her set: Adele? Taylor…
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I’m Not Just Sure. I’m Covid Positive!
There hasn’t been much activity here on The Daily Dave recently because I am the newest member of — drumroll, please — the Covid Breakthrough Case Club. Despite two vaccine shots and a booster, I tested positive for Covid on Wednesday afternoon. Here are the answers to the questions everyone…
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The Cards Are Stacked Against Us
Hi there, greeting card companies! There are millions of Jews in the United States1, and I’m willing to bet that nearly all of us celebrate Hanukkah in some fashion. Why, then, do you put so little time and effort into Hanukkah cards? Every year, without fail, we’re disappointed to go…
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You Can Take the Boy out of Britain, but You Can’t Take Britain Out of His Vocabulary
The first time I told the Complimentary Spouse I felt “a bit peckish,” he looked at me quizzically and asked what he had done wrong. His response confused me. Why would he think I was accusing him of something when I only wanted a snack? It turns out that he…
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The Sounds of Hanukkah
It’s Hanukkah! Let’s celebrate with a few non-terrible Hanukkah songs. The first is “Puppy for Hanukkah” by the incomparable Daveed Diggs, best known for “Hamilton.” Neither Lucy nor Linus are Hanukkah puppies, but they get Hanukkah gifts each year. Linus doesn’t like to share toys, and Lucy has a flazéda…
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Neat Tweets
Appropos of nothing, here is a list of some recent tweets I have enjoyed. First, in “30 Rock,” there are a few throwaway jokes implying that Sbarro, the restaurant chain, is actually run by the wealthy and powerful Sbarro family. In one episode, Jack is trying to convince his girlfriend…
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A Salute to Rubin Simanoff on Veterans Day
My World War II hero is my grandfather, Technical Sergeant Rubin Simanoff of the 353rd Army Corps of Engineers. I never met Rubin, but I imagine he was a lot like me: Loud, social, and clever. He loved to chat and entertain. He was proud to be an American, yet…
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Mary Lou Retina
As the ophthalmologist was preparing me for photocoagulation this afternoon, it took every ounce of restraint in my body to not turn to him and say, “Do you expect me to talk?” That’s because, until today, my only knowledge of laser surgery came from this scene: It turns out that…
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Here Comes the Sun (an Hour Earlier Than Yesterday)
Daylight Saving Time1 kicked in yesterday, and lots of people seem upset. I’m not one of them. I time my runs with the sunrise, and an earlier start means I won’t be late for work. Ergo, I won’t have to give up sights like this — the blue hour from…
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Gen Z Needs a New Name. This Gen Xer Explains Why.
I am part of Gen X, the most neglected, overlooked, and ignored generation in modern American history. We grew up under the monstrous weight of the baby boomers, a group whose importance is completely outweighed by its sense of self-importance. The baby boomers dominated our formative years. We got their…