• Hoop-De-Do!

    The Complimentary Spouse and I went to an NBA game Saturday night. It was my first basketball game in more than two decades ā€” my brother and I went to an Orlando Magic game sometime in the ā€™90s, but I donā€™t recall exactly when. After this weekend’s experience, Iā€™m hooked…

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  • Every May 10, the Four Questions Gather to Drive Snakes to the Center of Town and Whack Them to Snake Heaven

    What is Dave wearing today? Dave is wearing a devil costume and brandishing maracas. How does Dave feel today? Dave is giddy with anticipation. What are the factors affecting Daveā€™s mood today? Today is Whacking Day, our hallowed snake skull cracking day! Everyone loves Whacking Day. Is Dave having second…

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  • How Much Are the Four Questions in the Window?

    What is Dave wearing today? Dave doesnā€™t know what heā€™s wearing because heā€™s covered in dog hair. How does Dave feel today? Dave feels the weight of two dogs playing on top of him. What are the factors affecting Daveā€™s mood today? Dave was just lying on the sofa, listening…

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  • Opulence! The Four Questions Own Everything!

    What is Dave wearing today? Dave looks monochromatic in a gray polo shirt, a (different shade of) gray shorts, and white socks. How does Dave feel today? Dave feels inadequate. What are the factors affecting Daveā€™s mood today? Dave has yet to master the five elements of vogue: catwalk, duckwalk,…

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  • The Four Questions Bring it to You Every Ball

    What is Dave wearing today? Dave is wearing an Alabama polo shirt and shorts. How does Dave feel today? Dave is feeling emotional. What are the factors affecting Daveā€™s mood today? The Complimentary Spouse and Dave just watched the second episode of the third season of Pose. Did Dave have…

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  • The Ability to Destroy a Planet Is Insignificant Next to the Power of the Four Questions

    What is Darth Dave wearing today? Darth Dave is wearing an all-black outfit, a black mechanical breastplate covered in switches and dials, and a black mask that hides his entire head. His lightsaber is attached to his belt. How does Darth Dave feel today? Darth Dave feels somewhat conflicted about…

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  • Inside of a Dog, Itā€™s too Dark to Read the Four Questions

    What is Dave wearing today? Dave is wearing a Bucs polo shirt, because yay sportsball! How does Dave feel today? Dave is doing great! What are the factors affecting Daveā€™s mood today? Dave has a busy but enjoyable week ahead, and family from New York is visiting this weekend. Has…

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  • Frankly, my Dear, I Donā€™t Give the Four Questions

    What is Dave wearing today? Dave is wearing a Mickey Mouse T-shirt and light tan shorts.  How does Dave feel today? Dave is feeling a little bit anxious.  What are the factors affecting Daveā€™s mood today? Dave has had an enjoyable weekend (he had some Inca Kola with lunch and is looking forward…

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  • Hiring Shaq Doesnā€™t Guarantee a Slam Dunk

    There are few things that delight me more than seeing a poorly conceived ad on teevee. Itā€™s wasteful, and I cringe when I think about the armies of people who tossed wads of dollars into a creative effort that entirely missed the mark. And thatā€™s why I enjoy them ā€”…

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  • Godzilla vs. Kong vs. the Four Questions

    What is Dave wearing today? Dave is wearing a blue T-shirt and light gray shorts. How does Dave feel today? Dave is content. What are the factors affecting Daveā€™s mood today? After a long week, Dave is lying on the couch, watching mindless teevee, and thereā€™s a dog sleeping on…

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