Category: Four Questions

What is Dave wearing today? Dave is wearing a blue short-sleeve button-down shirt, a Chelsea cap, khaki shorts, and flip-flops.

What is making Dave happy today? The Complimentary Spouse and Dave are about to have a meeting with all his cousins to plan this year’s Cousins’ Weekend.

What is Dave’s inspirational thought for the day? Dave says even if something is on sale, don’t buy it if you don’t need it. Spending $50 is better than spending $100 … but spending $0 is better than spending $50.

What is the Cousins’ Weekend Dave alluded to? Once a year, Dave, his brother, his cousins, and all their spouses converge on a major American city to hang out, do some sightseeing, eat great food, and become drunkened on liquors.

What is Dave wearing today? Dave is wearing shorts, a Lightning T-shirt, his black Adidas hoodie, and flip flops. It’s very similar to Dave’s ensemble from yesterday.

What is making Dave happy today? After a somewhat busy day, Dave is finally relaxing on the couch and watching a Lizzo concert on teevee. It’s the same tour that The Complimentary Spouse and Dave saw in Tampa a few months ago. Here are some photos. The flute Lizzo’s playing in the third photo is named Sasha.

What is Dave’s inspirational thought of the day? Dave loves the following quote by Lizzo:

I don’t think that loving yourself is a choice. I think that it’s a decision that has to be made for survival; it was in my case. Loving myself was the result of answering two things: Do you want to live? ’Cause this is who you’re gonna be for the rest of your life. Or are you gonna just have a life of emptiness, self-hatred and self-loathing? And I chose to live, so I had to accept myself.

Lizzo, 2019 interview with NBC News

What were the results of Dave’s DNA test? Dave, sadly, is not 100% that bitch. He’s 94% European Jewish, which should come as a surprise to nobody.

What is Dave wearing today? Dave is wearing a grey T-shirt, blue shorts, black Adidas hoodie, and flip-flops.

What is making Dave happy today? Dave is celebrating the end of a successful work week.

What is Dave’s inspirational thought of the day? Dave says don’t fast and break things. Instead, move intentionally and improve things.

What book did Dave just finish? Dave finished reading “Profiles in Ignorance” by Andy Borowitz. It’s about how stupidity in conservative politics, once something to be concealed, is now celebrated. His premise:

By elevating candidates who can entertain over those who can think, mass media have made the election of dunces more likely.

Profiles in Ignorance, Andy Borowitz

What do we do about it? We need to do more than observe, Borowitz says. We need to act.

We think we’re participating in politics, but we’re often just spectators, following it the way we follow sports. Obsessively watching cable news, checking Twitter, and monitoring the latest polls — all of which I’ve been guilty of — makes us feel like we’re staying informed, but to what end? When I do these things, I’m just a passive observer, rooting for my team. There’s a difference between going to a Super Bowl party and playing in the Super Bowl; only those who do the latter affect the outcome of the game.

Profiles in Ignorance, Andy Borowitz

What is Dave wearing today? Dave is wearing a pink polo shirt and khaki shorts.

What is making Dave happy today? Dave is celebrating Linus’ third gotcha day. I still remember the day we adopted him.

What is Dave’s inspirational thought for the day? Dave says it’s time to get rid of your AOL email account.

Does Dave still have an AOL account? No, Dave doesn’t have an AOL account. The name he wanted was taken.

What is Dave wearing today? Dave is wearing an Alabama polo shirt, brown shorts, and Stan Smiths.

What is making Dave happy today? David had a productive day at work and is now relaxing in front of the teevee with the Complimentary Spouse. We are watching the eight-part Bernardo Bertolucci retrospective on PBS.¹

What is Dave’s inspirational thought for the day? Dave says you have to fight for your right to party. Just ask Adore Delano.

Is there any kind of party that Dave would not fight for his right for? Many years ago, Britt and Dave were promised a make-your-own quesadilla bar at a party. They arrived to find a few bags of shredded cheese, tortillas, and one of those electric quesadilla makers you can buy for $15 at Target. Britt, Dave, and about ten other people spent most of the evening making small talk while standing around a table and making sad quesadillas one at a time. No one should fight for the right to that kind of party.

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¹ Either that or reruns of RuPauls’ Drag Race All Stars. They’re very similar.

What is Dave wearing today? Dave is wearing an Emory T-shirt, brown shorts, and a Chelsea cap.

What is making Dave happy today? Dave is grateful and relieved that Lucy is fine after a health scare earlier today. This afternoon, the Complimentary Spouse dropped a single red grape on the floor and Lucy lunged for it. Before Britt could pick it up, Lucy ate it. Grapes are highly toxic to dogs — in fact, eating just one grape can be fatal — so I rushed Lucy to the emergency vet. They checked her out and induced vomiting. The grape came up in one piece, which was good news, as it meant it hadn’t been digested. The vet then gave Lucy some fluids, made sure she was OK, and sent us home. After all the excitement, we lay down on the bed and took a little nap.

What’s Dave’s inspirational thought for the day? Dave says you can’t put a price on the health of a family member. (Well, actually, you can, and Dave has the invoice to prove it. But you know what he means.)

How is Lucy now? Dave says Lucy seems to be fine, but a little tired. She’s currently lying down next to Dave on the couch.

What is Dave wearing today? Since Dave’s not leaving the Camp David today (as he doesn’t want to deal with Gasparilla madness), he’s just lounging around in grey sweatpants, a pink sweatshirt, and comfy grey socks.

What is making Dave happy today? Dave loves these lazy Saturdays.

What is Dave’s inspirational thought for the day? Dave says to change the channel immediately when a show comes on that claims astronauts have located the Garden of Eden.

What is Dave’s greatest fear right now? Dave is worried that it might not actually be a lazy Saturday.

What is Dave wearing today? Dave is wearing a blue-and-white octopus print button-down shirt, khaki shorts, white socks, and Stan Smiths.

What is making Dave happy today? Dave got a lot accomplished at work today, and he might reward himself with a cookie from Crumbl.

What is Dave’s inspirational thought for the day? Dave says that if you’re procrastinating because a project looks boring, just commit to doing 10 minutes of work. The whole thing will probably be done before you know it.

What comes to Dave’s mind every time he hears the word “irony”? Unlike most people, who think of this Alanis Morissette song …

… Dave recalls this malapropism from the Simpsons: